...but back to my mother...
There are so many unfinished conversation, unanswered questions, more hugs to have been had, more times to have been held. To be held a way a mother holds you no matter how old you are...I can only imagine what that feels like as an adult..And, I am angry. I'm sad. I'm grateful. I am all of it.
I am longing for that connection that binds us as mothers, daughters, women, sisters, friends....some people will say your mother is never your friend. I beg the differ. Or maybe I just fantasize about what our relationship would look like in my mind. And in reality that may not be so....but, with my imagination and what I knew of my mother..I think it would have come close...my heart was heavy yesterday, still is today...I don't think that longing will ever go away...ever..
You will always be in my heart, in my conversations in my head, and in my dreams..,
Charlestown Beach in RI. in honor of my mother, Veronica.