This morning was my first morning leaving the house with out George. I was a little bit nervous, I will admit. I had a flashback of the time when it was just Trinity and she was 4 weeks old, same age as Luna, when we were going on our first outing together with out George to my first LLL meeting. I sat in the car at the wheel and cried. Not quite the same this time except for the crying part.
No this time it was a morning of BellaSky watching Winnie the Pooh, while Trinity and I negotiate when she will get dressed,Luna is on the bed being engrossed by the light outside, while George heats himself up breakfast.
After losing the battle in getting BellaSky dressed, I feed Luna and thinking of a way to get BellaSky out of the house. I succeed in getting her tights and shirt on and she is off sliding on the floor. I feed Luna again.
I successfully get all of them out of the house just in time. I am not even sure how it happened. I do know that I was calm about it though. I was very proud of myself. They were seat belted and ready to go. I am at the wheel. Hands free. They are quietly playing in the back and as I am driving I realize... I am alone. I turn on the radio and a slow song helps me release the intense emotion that I was holding inside of me. I did it! The only person that I really wanted to speak to at that moment was my father. I told him how much I loved him and what an amazing father he is and thanked him for being my dad. Tears running down my face. I was so emotional. He embraced me in such a way that I felt so held by him. It was such a beautiful moment of connection with him. I will forever remember that moment. I knew that he saw me, he really knew what I was feeling. Thank you daddy.
I was a great morning...